Anal play includes stroking and massaging, oral stimulation and penetration of the anus. Your butthole is full of nerve endings, making it highly sensitive.

Penis-owners have a prostate gland located inside their bum that can provide a lot of pleasure when stimulated. To find the prostate gland; slide your finger in and press it towards the belly. The prostate gland feels soft and spongy.

Vulva-owners are even luckier. Since the wishbone-shaped clitoris extends all the way down to the anus, vulva-owners can orgasm during butt play.


Make sure you’re well-educated about anal sex.

Go to the bathroom and take a shower at least one hour before play to avoid a messy situation (unless messy situations are like, ‘your thing’). 

While not mandatory, anal douching might provide more insurance. Educate yourself on how-to before trying this for the first time.

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The anus doesn’t self-lubricate as the vagina does . Use the amount of lube you think you’ll need and then add some more.

A silicone lubricant, such as überlube, is very slippery and doesn’t need to be reapplied as often as a waterbased lubricant.

However, don’t use silicone lube on silicone toys. When using silicone toys, opt for a waterbased lube instead.

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Congrats if you ended up having a XXL buttplug up your bum the last time. Unfortunately this doesn’t mean you can start like this the next time.

Always take your time to warm-up. Don’t go from zero to penis/dildo straight away.

The best way to start is by massaging the outer tissue or by oral stimulation. Next, use the tiniest butt plug you can find or a finger. Work your way up from there as you please.

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Butt plugs come in different kinds of materials. For newbies it might be more comfortable to stick to silicone as it is soft, squishy, flexible and adapts to your body temperature.

If you would like to insert a toy to keep it there, giving you a feeling of fullness, butt plugs or anal beads are the way to go. Use a dildo if you’re more into the sensation of back-and-forth movement.

Wash your toys before and after use.

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Use gloves if you’re uncomfortable with getting messy. Even after anal cleansing, there’s always a small chance poop will be transferred to your toy or finger. Don’t freak out, or even worse, blame the other person for it when this happens.

Use toys with a wide base to avoid an awkward visit to the emergency room.

Don’t tolerate discomfort. When you’re in pain or discomfort you can try to use more lubricant, continue with a smaller toy or massaging your butthole instead, pause or even stop.

Don’t use numbing cream or drugs. It’s important to know what’s going on down there and to feel when something’s not right to avoid short or long-term damage.

Don’t go from butt to vagina without cleaning up in between to avoid unpleasant infections.

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Anal play has nothing to do with your sexuality. Aka: enjoying anal as a guy does not make you gay.

Anal play is just like any other sexual activity something that requires full consent. There are too many stories of people  being forced by their partner to try anal play. ‘’It’s normal to be in pain, you just have to push through and it will be better.’’ ‘’It’s only painful because you’re too stressed out. Come on, just relax!’’ ‘’Everyone is doing it.’’ FUCK.THIS.SHIT. NEVER let somebody push you into doing something that you don’t like.

Yes, you can get sexually transmitted infections when having anal sex.

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